I've been on this wave of being antisocial because people around me keep disappointing me and are annoying as fuck. I genuinely prefer to be alone and don't like being around people. It dampers my spirit and grosses me out. I can be sensitive to people's vibes and energy, so I just feel more calm and level headed when I am alone. I don't feel lonely. The interest to be sociable right now is just off the table. It doesn't make me feel better. It doesn't make the pain go away. I just feel like it's empty and meaningless, and the connection is just not there. Depression is still affecting me no matter how many people talk to me.  I know how to talk to people, but I just don't have the desire to because the people around me are kinda boring to me, which is weird because they probably think that I am boring, but that's irrelevant. People have their own thoughts and opinions that don't have anything to do with me. I just wish people would get off my ass about being more sociable. Like I just don't fucking like these people that much, and I am just naturally introverted. Get over it, please. Give up, because I'm not going to change just because someone said so. Their opinion holds no weight with me. At all.  It's not going to change anything, but I'll just be faking like I'm having fun when I wish I was far away from people's drama and bullshit. I'm kind of a pessimist and an optimist, but I usually think that people are going to disappoint me and make false promises because that's what I have experienced. A lot of people are full of shit, and it's sucks, but this is just fact. Some people think I owe them something I never promised. I generally don't make promises I can't keep, but the general public does. I just don't have time for people's drama. There are people who just love drama for no fucking reason, and I hate that shit so much. Like you could be putting that energy into something that actually mattered. It ain't nothing to cut people off, because I'm the type that doesn't have the patience or time for misplaced feelings. I have actually shit to be worried about and their feelings aren't one of them. Nobody gave a fuck about how I felt, so they can miss me with that shit. Acting like we so close. Bitch, I don't even fuck with you like that! Anyway, I'm tired of annoying people. I genuinely don't give a fuck. I am focused on my future. All of this high school, teenager drama is really stupid, tired, and irrelevant to my bottom line. People really be repeating the same tired ass cycles. Can you evolve?! Damn! I just don't get it and don't think I ever will, but that's fine. I can't deal. I'm done.